saturn return to sender

Either I’m missing something or it’s ridiculously hard to build a self-contained plugin architecture for an OS X app.
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I am not exactly atheist, not really agnostic, not Christian, not a practicing Buddhist. I do not self-identify with any religion, yet in the past couple of weeks I found myself decorating my house, buying presents, generally doing the American Christmas thing. I’ve been thinking about this lately, wondering whether I’m justified in all that, what the holiday is about for me, personally. Primarily, I’m just mindlessly going with the flow and meeting the expectations of the vast majority of the culture.

However, when it comes to my personal experience and choices, I am wanting to be somewhat mindful, at least a little curious, and not 100% cynical. If I’m not Christian, am I “allowed” to celebrate Christmas? If I do follow the standard American Christmas script, is that script only a shallow exercise in consumerism and gift-giving? Isn’t there supposed to be something transcendent in all of this?
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Dipping my toes into the 3Trace project again … for future reference, (and because it’s weirdly hard to google this info) here’s my global-ignore setting in ~/.subversion/config:

global-ignores = *.o *.lo *.la #*# .*.rej *.rej .*~ *~ .#* .DS_Store *~.nib *.pbxuser .xvpics build *.mode1 *.mode1v3

Stuff after .DS_Store is what I added. I think that’s what you want to keep svn from complaining about transient XCode/Infterface Builder files. According to the XCode docs, you might want to let .pbxuser files through. Will edit this if it turns out to be wrong.

(As an aside, there’s some discussion on Alex’s blog about iWork bundles and subversion. Apple blows away the .svn folder inside iWork document bundles when you save them, making them impossible/annoyingly hard to manage via subversion. I think I’m the only one who thinks they’re justified in doing that, even though I agree that it’s less than ideal behavior. =) )

Skepticism.

Unintentional infatuation.

Pure, dirty lust.

Unabashed tunnel-vision, attached-at-the-hip addiction.

Flagging enthusiasm.

Nagging boredom.

Guilty neglect.

Embarrassed disavowal.

That’s me and music lately. So many quick aural flings, so little time. Sia is this week’s. She sang on some of my favorite Zero 7 tunes; I flirted with “Numb” for months; finally I broke down and bought her solo album Colour the Small One. After some resistance I’m now helpless before the catchy pop sculptures that are “The Bully,” “Sunday,” and “Breathe Me.” The truth is I’m a sucker for suspended fourths and sevenths and her producers have seduced me with delicious drum kits which are deliciously mixed. The kicks so airy, the brushes so thick! The album’s dynamic range is suggestive and voluptuous in a crowd of ditzy, anemic pop built of three decibels. And Sia herself is gravelly silk, the voice of a thoughtful vixen in sad trip-hop makeup. Sheesh, me and the melancholy-pretty… Can’t help it.

But I can see the break-up coming. It always does.

Still, Colour the Small One is making me want to buy Apogee products and Logic. I want to make pretty melancholy things, too! With someone else’s voice, obviously. (Not that I um, have anyone in mind. )

But I also haven’t taken any decent photos for years. I haven’t painted for fun for a decade. I need to finish my thesis this decade. Too many interests, not enough time … or commitment.